Tag: twitter

Durex Played Us With Its Eggplant Condom Hoax

eggplant3-0While food can be an aphrodisiac, and the eggplant emoji is everyone’s favorite sexual innuendo, we’re pretty sure not many people would find eggplant erotic. At least not when it comes to flavored condoms. This is why Durex’s recent eggplant-flavored condom hoax was so genius.

When Durex tweeted “#BreakingNews: We’re launching an exciting new savoury#condom range – Eggplant flavour! #CondomEmoji,” most people were just confused. But some people were quick to call Durex’s bluff, figuring the condom company couldn’t possibly be ridiculous and impractical enough to think people want their junk to taste like veggies. Durex admitted to the ruse, tweeting that since everyone loves a good sexual emoji, why not have an actual condom emoji? Good point, Durex—and well played.


Looking for something naughty yourself? Whether or not you like eggplant, we’ve got just the thing to make you smile!

Check out more about Durex’s eggplant-flavored condom joke: https://mashable.com/2016/09/05/eggplant-flavoured-condoms/#sE0k5yGaMSqi

Russia Blocks Access To Pornhub and YouPorn

img_5939The biggest adult websites in the world, Pornhub and YouPorn, have been blocked in Russia. This is the second time Roskomnadzor, the state agency watchdogs in charge of monitoring the internet, blocked the porn sites. It seems the Russian government wants citizens to go “meet people in real life.”

An official Pornhub twitter account responded to the news by tweeting this (indecent) proposal to the Russians: “If we gave you a guys Pornhub Premium account, will you un ban Pornhub in Russia?” Roskomnadzor responded with: “@Pornhub sorry, we are not in the market and the demography is not a commodity.” Those Russian prudes really have some snappy comebacks—we bet their sexually frustrated citizens find them hilarious.

Want to exercise your sexual freedom? Here’s to life, liberty, and the right to watch internet porn!

Check out more about Russia blocking Pornhub and YouPorn here: https://www.thegailygrind.com/2016/09/15/russia-blocks-access-pornhub-youporn-tells-citizens-go-meet-people-real-life/

9 Hilarious Tweets About Masturbating

Image Source: Flickr.com | User: rccola159When it comes to cracking jokes about jerking off, you just have to give a hand (see what we did there?) to these witty people writing hilarious tweets about masturbating. As one Twitter user says, masturbation is really just a “VERY poorly attended orgy.” Here are 9 hilarious tweets about masturbating.

  1. “Good term for masturbation I just thought of – Jackin’ the peen stalk”
    Gotta climb to the top of the peen stalk and wrestle the one-eyed ogre to get that golden goose!
  2. “My caught masturbating face is exactly the same as my caught jamming out to NSYNC face because they’re simultaneous.”
    We don’t know, the latter might be more embarrassing…
  3. “Who called it “Masturbation tips for women” rather than ‘Dildos and Dildon’ts’.”
    It’s funny cause it’s true!
  4. “If there’s a sock on my doorknob it means I’m having sex with the other one.”
    Make sure you knock before entering!
  5. “If these walls could talk I’d almost certainly masturbate less.”
    Good thing they can’t—no reason to stop jerkin’ it!
  6. “Do guys have a go to masturbation sock like I do with shoesHAHAHA I’M KIDDING! I would never! I’m a lady.

    It’s an adorable strappy sandal.”
    Talk about a foot fetish!
  7. “The first rule of masturbation club is to come alone.#NationalMasturbationDay”
    The second rule of masturbation club: You do not talk about masturbation club—unless you’re cracking jokes about it on Twitter!
  8. “Is ‘toot my own horn’ a euphemism for masturbating yet?”
    It is now!
  9. “My friends gave me a bunch of sex toys for my birthday as a ‘joke.’ I can’t stop laughing*

    *masturbating”
    The gift that keeps on giving, er, receiving?

Looking to find some good lovin’ without the aid of a sock? We don’t mean to toot our own horn, but a NiteFlirt party is SO much better than a party of one!

Check out more hilarious tweets about masturbating here: https://www.buzzfeed.com/jasminnahar/tweets-about-masturbating-that-are-just-really-really-fun#.iaDVgWbqox

Meet the XXX She Wolf of Wall Street

Image Source: Twitter.com | The Porn’s newest up-and-cummer (see what we did there?) hails from a pretty unlikely place: Wall Street. That’s right, 23-year-old Veronica Vain quit her job as a finance intern on Wall Street for a career in the adult film industry. But before she left, she made sure to post racy photos of herself on social media from her company’s bathroom, saying “I just left a job on Wall Street for a porn career because I can’t stop masturbating at work and would rather get cum all over my face. Is that cool with you?”

At her Wall Street job, Vain grew bored with the 9-to-5 corporate office setting, and felt getting into porn would offer her a much more titillating experience—literally: “I really like sex,” she told the Daily Beast. Vain has big plans for porn, and she just finished shooting her first film, the aptly-titled Screwing Wall Street: The ArrangementFinders IPO. She spoke with the Daily Beast after and said she had a blast: “It was hardcore. It was not timid or introductory in any way and I felt really excited by having the camera crew there. I loved it. I felt like this is what I am supposed to be doing, not Excel spreadsheets.” Well, probably better to get screwed in porn than on Wall Street!

Looking for something titillating yourself? The kinds of excitement you’ll find here would put those Wall Street guys to shame!

Check out more about the XXX she wolf of Wall Street here: https://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/02/07/the-xxx-she-wolf-of-wall-street.html

In ‘Babes For Trump’ Women Bare All In Hopes of ‘Making America Great Again’

small handsSome of Donald Trump‘s female supporters are rallying behind the candidate in the newest social media campaign that proves hot women have strong political convictions—and also nice T&A! “Babes For Trump,” which is run by four college dudes, proclaims that it’s “Making America Great Again One Babe At A Time.” Huffington Post reports, “The photos range from women covering their nipples with Trump stickers, to others where support for Trump is expressed through campaign slogans Sharpied onto women’s butts.”

The account, which is on Snapchat and Twitter, admits that “sex sells,” and doesn’t deny that it uses sexual images of women to get attention for Trump. Babes For Trump also promotes what Trump is often criticized for—his sexist remarks that suggest a woman’s worth should be determined by her looks. An example of this can be seen in one post showing a split-screen image of a female Bernie Sanders supporter and the butts of two Trump supporters. The caption reads, “You decide. We know who we’re going with.” So, America, go out there and vote—just be sure to ask the woman with the nice ass ahead of you in line who she’s voting for!

Looking for something a bit provocative yourself? Come show your support for NiteFlirt!

Check out more about Babes For Trump here: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/babes-for-trump-instagram_us_56f9c245e4b014d3fe23f8b8

Kanye Denies His Kinkiness—And That’s a Shame

kanyeThis week, America’s favorite self-aggrandizing rapper, the Yeezus aka Kanye West, got into yet another public feud on social media, this time with Wiz Khalifa. When West stepped over the line and insulted his and Khalifa’s ex, Amber Rose, the anti-slut shaming hero chimed in, calling out West for his kinky proclivities. She tweeted this: “Awww @kanyewest are u mad I’m not around to play in ur asshole anymore? #FingersInTheBootyAssBitch” West immediately denied his love of ass play, replying with: “Exes can be mad but just know I never let them play with my ass … I don’t do that … I stay away from that area all together.”

It’s a shame that West doesn’t embrace his kinkiness, but what many proponents of consensual adult kink have said is much worse is Amber Rose’s homophobic and sexist tweet suggesting that men who like ass play are “bitches.” They’ve also called her out for her disappointing and hypocritical sex shaming. One sex expert commented, “Especially with the hashtag, #FingersInTheBootyAssBitch, that is exactly the kind of homophobia that makes it difficult to explore prostate play. It’s the male equivalent of slut shaming.” He adds that lots of men—gay and straight—enjoy prostate stimulation, and there’s nothing wrong with that. “Your nerve endings have nothing to do with your sexual orientation,” he explains. Too bad Kanye didn’t get the memo.

In the mood for some kinky fun? Ain’t no shame in this game!

Check out more about Kayne denying his kinkiness here: https://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/01/30/don-t-kink-shame-kanye.html

Twitter’s Hilarious, Erotic Fanfiction about the Militia Standoff

You may have read about the armed militia in rural Oregon taking over a wildlife refuge in protest of the government. And maybe you’ve even thought about the parallels between the militant outdoorsmen and the rugged gay cowboys in Brokeback Mountain. Well, now the Decemberists’ frontman and native Oregonian Colin Meloy has officially ignited the internet’s imagination with his erotic gay fanfiction about the standoff on Twitter. Here are the gems.

 

 

 

Wow. Glad to hear the rebels are staying warm during those cold, lonely nights in the Oregon wilderness the sexy way! Have a hankering for something other than snacks yourself? You can cozy up beside our soft flannels right here!

Check out more erotic fanfiction about the militia standoff here: https://blogtown.portlandmercury.com/BlogtownPDX/archives/2016/01/06/decembrists-frontman-colin-meloy-tweeted-erotic-fanfiction-about-the-militia-standoff-and-its-awesome

NEWS: Sex Sells in Silicon Valley

Silicon Valley is filled with innovation, entrepreneurship, and sex workers! CNN unveiled that the Silicon Valley has a thriving sex industry, where women are charging up to $400-$500 per hour.  This makes total sense, the work obsessed young Internet moguls in the valley don’t have time to wine and dine, so dropping $500 on a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am with a professional seems like the feasible route to take.

Don’t let these sex workers fool ya though, it must be something in the air over there, but they’re just as tech savvy as their rich clients. A few sex workers explained they’re accepting credit card transactions by utilizing Square, a credit card reader that attaches to your smartphone, the workers are registering it as a “consulting service”. I’m completely blown (pun intended) away by the business driven minds in the Valley!  Sounds like something we can incorporate into our own little world, huh?  😉

Some of these working women are becoming avid social media enthusiasts working in the sex industry too! “Everything I know about social media marketing I learned doing sex work,” sex worker Kitty Stryker told CNNMoney. “Currently I’m using Hootsuite a lot; I’m using Klout a little bit. I also use Twitter calendar, which is just this simple free thing, but it’s got very interesting analytics data.” I’m confident these women have some clients that could assist setting up their very own Facebook Business Page, LOL.
Article for Link: https://www.playboy.com/playground/view/up-in-smoke-silicon-valley-sex-workers

PhoneSexLove: My Interview with “MJ”

I am Mistress June and this is an interview with the new marketing guy at NiteFlirt, MarketingJohn. Referred to sometimes as MJ but not to be confused with Michael Jackson. (I have a few connections, but not those kinds of connections.)

Question #1 – Who are you? You can be direct, you can muse metaphysically, you can share whatever you like. But please tell us who you are and be sure to include what you do for a living.

MJ: I am the new guy. The guy who has taken over Marketing at NiteFlirt. I come from a crazy background, with hands in all kinds of quirky businesses and ‘off the beaten path’ gigs and adventures. I bring a real strong creative sensibility to my world here at NiteFlirt and intend on pushing as many envelopes as I possibly can, although admittedly most of those envelopes may already be open in this little world that we all call home now. Ha.

I’ve already had about a thousand ideas for ways that we could grow business here at the ‘Flirt, but it’ll be a bit of a push for a little while to get things up and running. I think within a short amount of time we’ll all come up with a million new ideas that we can work into the company, and I can really piss off my immediate superiors with. That’s my cute way of mentioning that I LOVE input and creative ideas thrown my way, so don’t hesitate!

Question #2 – You mention testing your boss and getting creative. I relate to that rebel artist energy very much! But I am curious about the structure you will be rebelling against. What can you share with us about NiteFlirt to help us understand this phone sex industry platform that so many of us have come to depend on?

MJ:  I’m more referring to that rebel energy in terms of coming up with newer and more creative ways to market ourselves. It can always be a challenge within the adult industry so we need to spin a web that is inclusive of everyone without scaring anyone away. It can be tricky! It is such an interesting space because, let’s face it, almost everyone LOVES what we do, but a lot of those people prefer to keep that love somewhat hidden. It’s my job to find ways to draw those people out a little more and show them that it’s alright to let their kink flag fly with us!
At NiteFlirt we really consider ourselves and the site to be just one big wacky, kinky team. We value the Flirts so much, as well as our callers, and just want to continue to create a world where we can all keep playing and enjoying ourselves. A big part of that is my job since I’m figuring out how to bring that world to all of us. The truth is that we all really love our jobs and we have a really great time working together.

Okay, question #3 – My last question, have you ever tried phone sex?
He he… just kidding! Are you blushing? No, that is not my last question either.
Final question, what is one of your goals for the future of NiteFlirt? Tell us about something you are working on.

MJ:  Ha. I am a bit of a pussycat so I haven’t really delved into phone sex too much. I know that’s not your official question but just answering because i don’t mind. I definitely don’t have the “I want to be dominated and pushed around” side really. But I guess sometimes the boys don’t know they do, huh? Ha.
I honestly have so many goals at the ‘Flirt. Continue to grow and build on the social media footprints that we have already started on the last few months. Everything from continuing to grow our Tumblr blog to better communication on Twitter, and a deeper community feel on Facebook. Not to mention NiteFlirt’s own blog! We’re active on so many other sites, but that’s just to name a few where people can engage with me and NiteFlirt as a whole.

We are also working to come up with some new and innovative ways that callers can interact with the Flirts. It’s all a little overwhelming right now because we are just trying to get things really rolling while cooking up new concepts as well. The beginning of something is always the toughest and I’m definitely dealing with that right now. My specialty is ‘having fun’ though so really I just want to come up with new and exciting ways that we can satisfy all the communities at NiteFlirt; the callers, the Flirts, the company, and everyone in between.

Well, thank you for your time, MarketingJohn! I am excited about the future of NiteFlirt and eager to see your fun angle on how we can all better connect.
Folks should feel free to contact MJ through any of the NiteFlirt social media outlets or through comments here.

(This is the first installment of PhoneSexLove, a
new weekly column to be published here each Wednesday. Find out
more and listen to an accompanying podcast at PhoneSexLove.com.)