Tag: sex

Emojis That Mean Dirty Words

sexyemojisEver get a text with an emoji that seems to mean more than the image itself? A dude sends you an emoji of an eggplant (cock) and a chocolate chip cookie (pussy), for instance. Or simply an emoji of a full mailbox (fucking). Well, this handy guide will help you know for sure what those sexually-charged emojis really mean. Here are a few favorites (check out the complete guide from Buzzfeed below).

Cock Emojis

  1. Ear of corn
  2. Peeled banana
  3. Rocket ship
  4. Red lipstick

Balls Emojis

  1. Cluster of grapes
  2. Two mugs of beer
  3. Pig’s snout

Ass Emojis

  1. Peach
  2. Sprinkly donut

Tits Emojis

  1. Two cherries
  2. Camel humps

Pussy Emojis

  1. Strawberry
  2. Slice of cake
  3. Hard candy
  4. Coin purse

Fucking Emojis

  1. Rollercoaster
  2. Blowfish (?)
  3. A bowl of ramen noodles
  4. Slice of pizza

Cumming Emojis

  1. “The Scream”
  2. Fountain overflowing
  3. A whale blowing water out of its spout

In the mood for a little fireworks, shooting star, happy face, tango emoji? We are always down for some trumpet-blowing, factory-smoke fun!

As promised: Buzzfeed‘s full guide.

If “Netflix and Chill” Were Honest

netflixandchillA new hilarious video on Buzzfeed (watch below) goes behind the seemingly innocent invitation to “Netflix and chill tonight?” As it turns out, what the question is actually asking is: “Do you want to bang tonight?” Yup, sounds about right!

In the video, a dude tells his roommate to “stay the fuck in your room” before his date comes over. When she does, they try to act casual and pretend to know things about wine before it’s time to “divert this nervous energy by looking at a screen.” Because, really, it’s all about wanting to “make out a lot”— and “do other stuff….” So after about 10 or 20 minutes of “hiding [your] boner with [your] elbow,” and saying things just to get close to each other’s mouth, it’s finally time to say “fuck it” and make a move! And, eventually, to pause the movie—or not!

Feel like coming over for a little “Netflix and chill?” We know what you’re really asking—and we like it!

Check out “If ‘Netflix and Chill’ Were Honest” here.

Horny Couple Gives Interview About Their Public Romp in a Parking Lot

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_sexybucketlistA woman in Virginia was arrested recently after having afternoon sex with her boyfriend in a parking lot (see video below). The couple was taken into custody by Norfolk police for engaging in a public sex act outside a shopping center. And, apparently, the local news station wanted to know all about it in an exclusive interview. So what prompted the couple to have an illicit fuck in a parking lot? “I’m not into erotic public sex, or anything like that,” she said. “That was all the alcohol.” Of course!

The police claim that when they found the couple mid-coitus on the concrete, the man was so drunk he was unconscious. But he assured the news station that he was into it, and that they both “had needs.” The man said, “I consented to it all. But I had a little too much to drink, and I passed out.” When asked if they would do anything like that again, the woman quickly said no, but the man took a moment to think it over before replying, “I don’t know.” Classic.

In the mood for a little afternoon delight? You don’t need alcohol to have a good time with us!

Here’s the video of the couple’s parking lot sex.

4 Weird Things That Will Make You Horny

set1147014All types of strange things make people horny (ahem, there’s a fetish for pretty much everything). But you’d be surprised at some of the weird phenomenons that turn people on. Here are some of the craziest stuff that gets people all hot and heavy.

  1. Brain Trauma: Yes, there are accounts of people who’ve become total horn-dogs after suffering a brain trauma. We wrote about a lady recently who went from normal college student to kinky dominatrix after a severe car accident. It’s because brain trauma affects your frontal lobe, which can have the crazy side effect of hyper-sexuality!
  2. Grief:
    If you’ve ever grieved, you may already know this, and science backs it up. Grief and sexual arousal are side-by-side in your brain, so anything that triggers fear, panic, or grief can inadvertently trigger your libido.
  3. Rabies:
    Rabies: definitely not sexy. But with all that foaming at the mouth and flipping out comes an unlikely side effect: crazy horniess. Because rabies makes your brain get inflamed, it can also cause some seriously dangerous need for action. At least you get some before you die?
  4. Breastfeeding:
    Yes, it is creepy to think that breastfeeding can make you horny, but biology is all about playing unseemly jokes on us. Breastfeeding releases a bunch of hormones, including oxytocin, the chemical that’s released during orgasms, which unfortunately can make you feel a bit tingly down there.

Feel like having some weird, sexy experiences yourself? We love crazy stuff that gets you all hot and bothered!

And, while you’re at it, check out more weird things that will make you horny!

New Study Proves Sex is Safe For Heart Attack Survivors

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_hornyheartHeart attack survivors are rejoicing at a new study’s fantastic good news: sex does not increase the likelihood of having another heart attack! Many survivors were unsure whether the vigorous activity of fucking could trigger another episode, but the new study shows that the activity generated by sex is about the same as climbing two flights of stairs or taking a brisk walk. This means that most survivors of a heart attack can (thankfully) resume sexual activity before too long.

In the study, researchers looked at the timing of the last sexual experience the participants had before the heart attack and found that just 0.7 percent of the people (three people) reported having sex within two hours of having a heart attack. This finding “is in line with observations that sexual activity might eventually trigger a [heart attack] only in a very small proportion of patients,” the researchers reported in the study. The study also showed that many heart attack survivors assume they can’t have sex without getting the necessary information from their doctors. “It is important to reassure patients that they need not be worried and should resume their usual sexual activity,” the researchers said. We can only imagine that this good news is more serious than a heart attack for these survivors!

Feel like partaking in some vigorous activity yourself? No need to exercise caution here!

Here’s more about the study that proves that sex is safe for heart attack survivors.

Morrissey’s Sex Scene Is So Awful It Inspired a Good Sex Award

imagesMorrissey’s latest foray into fiction writing has made him Twitter’s laughing stock and a shoo-in for this year’s Bad Sex Awards. Between his description of a boner as a “bulbous salutation” and his part about breasts “barrel-rolling” across the protagonist, Morrissey certainly made readers blush with his painfully bad sex scene. Thankfully, some great authors have done a much better job at writing good sex scenes. Here’s some of the best:

  1. Gustave Flaubert, Madame Bovary
    “The cloth of her habit caught against the velvet of his coat. She threw back her white neck, swelling with a sigh, and faltering, in tears, with a long shudder and hiding her face, she gave herself up to him.”
  2. Annie Proulx, Brokeback Mountain
    “…their mouths came together, and hard, Jack’s big teeth bringing blood, his hat falling to the floor, stubble rasping, wet saliva welling, and…pressing chest and groin and thigh and leg together, treading on each other’s toes until they pulled apart to breathe and Ennis, not big on endearments, said what he said to his horses and his daughters, little darlin.”
  3. Anaïs Nin, Delta of Venus
    “She pushed his hand away, took his sex into her mouth again, and with her two hands she encircled his sexual parts, caressed him and absorbed him until he came. He leaned over with gratitude, tenderness, and murmured, ‘You are the first woman, the first woman, the first woman …’”
  4. Arundhati Roy, The God of Small Things
    “She tasted him, salty, in her mouth. He sat up and drew her back to him. She felt his belly tighten under her, hard as a board. She felt her wetness slipping on his skin. He took her nipple in his mouth and cradled her other breast in his calloused palm. Velvet gloved in sandpaper.”

Feel like having an erotic experience that will leave you crying out “little darlin’”? We can make you say “I just can’t quit you” right here!

More good sex writing can be found here.

Vietnamese Censors Plan to Cut Sex Scenes to Just Five Seconds

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_cocks_on_filmFilm censors in Vietnam are planning to limit all sex scenes in films to just five seconds, regardless of how explicit or racy they are. The censors are also planning on only allowing no more than three “hot scenes” per film—whatever that means. The censorship is infuriating filmmakers who complain that their freedom of expression is being seriously threatened.

Producer Nguyen Van Nhiem said “sex is a natural activity and there is no need to ask artists to keep artful sex scenes short,” while award-winning director Nguyen Thanh Van argues that a scene “should be judged for its production and artistic value, not how technically long it is… Some shots are under a second but they are unbearable anyway.” While they make good points, this isn’t the first time Vietnamese censors have been excessively prudish with sex scenes: Fifty Shades of Grey lost 20 minutes of running time before it could be released, with all the famous BDSM scenes removed and only innocuous kissing scenes left in. Others are complaining that the censors are sexist, since they only define “hot scenes” as having a “totally nude actress.” If the censors continue this way, all audiences will be left saying is “Boo!”

Feel like having some “hot scenes” yourself? We are all about celebrating freedom of (sexy) expression here!

Here’s more about the Vietnamese censors’ plan.

Hologram Porn Takes Virtual Sex to the Next Level

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_oculus_xxxBrian Shuster, the pioneer who brought porn to the internet in the ’90s, now wants to up virtual reality’s and 3-D porn’s game with his newest innovation: hologram porn. Shuster is trying to start a new wave of virtual reality porn because he’s dissatisfied with current realistic but limited VR porn, like the newly released Oculus Rift. He envisions an immersive experience in a 3-D space where users can move around and see details as minute as hair follicles, just like you’d experience in real life.

Schuster says, “In current virtual reality you can turn your head and see where the performers are located, so you can look all around the scene, but from the standpoint of a performance you are still seeing porn performers from one angle in 3D.” He plans to change that by using live-action holograms that will enable users to view a performer from every angle. He’s also working on Syntholograms, or a realistically filmed scene where users can walk around their environment without seeing a cutoff. Schuster is currently trying to crowdfund his ambitious, extremely expensive 360-degree porn dream, promising live-action holograms “that will ensure your VR porn experiences in the future will be as mind-blowing as Sandra Bullock’s and Sylvester Stallone’s in Demolition Man.” But for now, 180-degree VR porn is still pretty amazing!

Feel like having an immersive, mind-blowing experience yourself? Who needs VR when you have NiteFlirt?!

Check out more about hologram porn here!

How Long Sex Lasts Versus How Long (We Think) We Want it to Last

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_havingsexIn pop culture, getting it on “all night long” and “till the break of dawn” seems to be the gold standard that makes sex great. So it makes sense that there’s a disconnect between how long sex lasts and how long people think they’d like it to last. But does longer sex mean better sex? Maureen O’Connor reported in New York that 75 percent of men prematurely ejaculated within only two minutes in 1948, whereas men now usually last on average between 5.7 and 7.5 minutes. Even though sex lasts much longer now, 80 percent of participants in a survey said they wanted sex to last 30 minutes or longer—at least twice as long!

O’Connor reports that “According to…sex therapists, sex is ‘too short’ when it lasts one to two minutes. ‘Adequate’ is three to seven minutes, and ‘desirable’ is seven to 13. The range for ‘too long’ went up to 30 minutes.” So why is that most people say that they want sex to be double what it is when “too long” can often be, well, too long? Despite porn’s and pop culture’s influence on what we think of as good sex, duration is not the most important factor. Good sex is really more about all the things that make it good—how hot it is, a partner’s responsiveness, how good you cum, etc.

Feel like having some “desirable” experiences yourself? We have all the right ingredients to make it great right here!

Here’s more about how long sex lasts versus how long we want it to last here:

The 3 Types of Sex Every Couple Should Have

Image Source: Flickr - 434pics

Let’s face it, having regular, good sex is great for a relationship. And once you’ve been in a relationship for long enough, you start to notice the different types of sex you’re having and how mixing them up can keep things interesting. That’s why the bestselling author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus advises all couples to make sure they’re having these 3 types of sex on a regular basis to heighten their intimacy and keep things spicy in the bedroom.

  1. Romantic “Gourmet” Sex
    This is the type of sex that includes thoughtful planning before the main event. Picture a romantic evening followed by a candle-lit bedroom set up complete with sensual music. “You’ve had all evening to build up the tension, and then you release it through sex,” the author says. “That’s gourmet sex.”
  2. Healthy “Home-Cooked” Sex
    This is your regular, no-frills but still awesome sex. It takes less time and effort than romantic sex—maybe 15 or 20 minutes of foreplay before getting down to business—but couples should make time for it at least once or twice a week.
  3. Quickie Sex
    Whether it’s a handjob, blowjob, or a quick 3-minute fuck, this is meant to be an in-and-out kind of thing squeezed in between busy schedules. You don’t need to take your time here, which is all part of the fun!

Feel like spicing things up in the bedroom yourself? We definitely know how to keep things fun and interesting here!

Check out more about the 3 types of sex every couple should be having here.