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6 Amazing Gay Porn Parodies Inspired By Your Favorite Hollywood Movies

Sure, we’ve all seen Batman and Robin, but have you seen Batman and Robin: An All Male XXX Parody? Or what about the newest Harry Potter’s?—you can have your pick between Whorrey Potter and the Sorcerer’s Balls and Larry Cotter and the Wizard of Ahhs. If you love these movies and other Hollywood classics, and you also happen to be a fan of hot gay porn, we have good news for you: you can watch amazing gay porn parodies inspired by your favorite movies! Here are some of the best.

Twinklight
Yes, this is Twilight but with gay vampires. What’s not to love?
Batman and Robin: An All Male XXX Parody
This just makes sense—everyone always knew that Batman and Robin were in a gay relationship!
Web of Sperm: A XXX Parody
This Spiderman gay parody will definitely turn on your spidey sense! The gay sex is so hot it will having you climbing up the walls while shooting white fluid from your body!
Larry Cotter and the Wizard of Ahhs
Synopsis: “This sexsational flick of hot twink lust introduces Brit BoyToy Larry Potter. Watch him wave his magic wand and make hot Brazilian soccer players appear. Lean teen, barely legal boys, hard pounding anal action, colossal cumshots, and a bit of magic.”
Green Lantern is Gay: A XXX Parody
Well, obviously he is! This gay porn parody will keep you (hard) on the edge of your seat as the Green Lantern fights to “win the heart and ass of his true love.”
G.I. MO: Rise of the Cock
Synopsis: “Gavin keeps a nice hard-on while he’s getting fucked, which I love about him. Bradley gives it to him good, and Gavin shoots a huge load all over his chest while Bradley’s fucking him, and then Bradley pulls out and shoots an amazing load himself. It made Gavin looked like a glazed doughnut!”

Wow, did all that hot gay sex turn on your spidey sense? Call NiteFlirt to find out if we’ll use our super powers to save you from your horniness!

Check out more amazing gay porn parodies inspired by your favorite Hollywood movies here.

What it’s Like to Have Sex in Space

If you’re into astronomy (and fucking), you’ve probably wondered at some point what sex in space would be like. Pornhub is currently trying to crowdfund the first ever x-rated space encounter to answer this question, but science tells us it might not be that easy. Though NASA once sent a married couple up into space together, the pair are not kissing and telling—which is the same for the other 540 or so people who’ve traveled above Earth. So what do we know about what it would be like to fuck in space?

Based on evidence from NASA and the Kinsey Institute (who have also wondered about cosmic coitus), sex in a gravity-less environment wouldn’t really work out that well. First, instead of blood flowing to the genitals in men and women, in space it would flow to the head, making it hard to get or maintain an erection, or even to feel aroused. It would also be difficult to stay in sexual positions in zero-gravity, not to mention how physically demanding it would be since you lose so much strength and muscle-mass in space. It’d also be pretty messy, since there’s no where for the fluids to go: it just sort of builds up, like an unsexy sponge.

Well, so much for that 250-mile high club! But here’s the good news: NiteFlirt can make you feel like you’re being shot into space without ever leaving the Earth!

Check out Slate‘s video about what it’d be like to have sex in space!

How To Have Sex With a Much Taller Person

If you’ve ever had sex with someone who’s much taller than you, you’ve probably experienced the frustrations of trying to get it on with your head stuck in an armpit or squished against a nipple. But there are plenty of ways to have great sex without letting height differences get in the way. Here are some tips to maximize sex with a much taller person.

Experiment with different ways of fucking
Height differences are the most pronounced during sex when the pelvises need to be perfectly aligned (i.e., missionary position). Try other types of fucking that won’t make someone towering over you so obvious: hand job, head, using sex toys, masturbating together, anal play, the options are endless!
Try different positions
Basically, any position where your bodies are perpendicular is key. Receiving partner on top is a good position where height differences won’t matter much. Getting bent over a chair, table, or bed works. Explore and have fun!
Use props
Thick pillows like couch cushions are great for propping up your hips. You can also use chairs and stools around your home to make your hips the same height. Or you can invest in sex pillows and wedges for a sturdy, sexy boost.

Feel like getting a sexy boost yourself? We know all types of ways to prop you up here!

Want more tips for how to have sex with a much taller person? Here ya go!

How to Have Sex on the Beach

What is it about the beach that makes people want to get frisky? Is it the minimal clothing, the lathering up with sun screen, or the amazing feeling of ocean waves crashing that puts people in the mood? Whatever the reason, if you’re dying to get wet n’ wild at the beach, we can help. Here are some tips to help you make the most of a day (of fucking) at the beach:

Do Your Research
While spontaneous sex is great, having spontaneous sex out in public is not a smart move. Before going at it you should do some recon about sweet spots that will be perfect for a sexy tryst. Less populated locations with coves, secret nooks, or large rocks are perfect. Walk around and also do some internet research to find the perfect place.
Don’t Get Caught
Don’t be like those people who go at it in the middle of the day with beach-goers basically looking on. Do it at night, and make sure there’s no people around. In short, be quick, be discreet, and be quiet.
Watch Out For Sand Getting in Sensitive Areas!
Sand is lovely on the feet—but it is definitely not lovely all up in your nether regions! Make sure you avoid this by getting it on in positions that will prevent sand-in-the-crotch. Doggy style is great, or just fucking upright against something like a rock or a lifeguard tower. Woman on top could also work—just be careful!
Consider Alternatives
If fucking on the beach is too hard to pull off, why not try getting it on in the water? The water will conceal what’s going on below the surface. It is also much easier to give hand jobs and blow jobs on the sand than it is to fuck, especially if you can keep yourself concealed under a blanket or a beach umbrella. It’ll give new meaning to the expression “More fun than a day at the beach!”

Of course, if you don’t want sand in your bits you can always just give us a call. We’ll make sure you feel like you’re having sex on the beach.

8 Unavoidably Unsexy Things That Happen the First Time You Fuck Someone

Distractify recently put together a list of the unavoidably unsexy things that happen during sex that will make you cringe with embarrassment and laugh with recognition. Let’s face it, sex for the first time with someone can definitely bring some awkwardness, and this list is a hilarious reminder of all those simply unavoidable moments. Here are the 8 unsexy things that happen the first time you fuck someone (check out the full list below):

Your bodies will make several sounds when they slap and detach, slap and detach
Distractify describes this phenomenon as “the sound of a wet suction cup being peeled from the side of a bathtub.”
You’ll direct your partner to what feels good like an air traffic controller
Wave an arm; use a code; try to decipher what the other person wants while trying to stick a perfect landing.
Yes, you will smell and probably have your face in their armpit
And possibly, if you’re into that, you will lick their armpit.
You will get hair in your mouth
At some point you will need to pause to get hair, pubic or otherwise, out of your mouth.
The condom ask and search party
Someone will ask, the other will search…and sometimes search and search and search for a condom: “sort of like a business deal and a scavenger hunt.”
There’ll be awkwardness putting the condom on
You try to do this as smoothly as possible, but it will inevitably be awkward.
Yes, air will get pushed inside places and noises will be made in response
Aw, yes. The unavoidable queef. It happens.
You are going to get sweaty
Distractify: “Not in a glisten-y way, but in an ‘oh my god, I didn’t know I could sweat there’ animal way.”

These are funny cause they’re true. In the mood to have some real experiences yourself? We don’t mind getting sweaty here!

Check out Distractify’s list.

Welcome, “SexySongBird”

By SexySongBird

Hi guys! I’m Wren! I’m so excited to be a part of Niteflirt and thus far I’ve been VERY well received here! Though I initially promoted myself as more of a traditional phone sex seductress, I seem to have attracted quite the following of sissies, inadequately endowed, and closet fags. Can I TELL you how much I LOVE that? While I thoroughly enjoy love-making, fucking, and role play, it gives me SUCH a thrill to get into your head and empty all of your dirty secrets! In just a couple of short weeks, I seem to have heard all I think I could, but something tells me one of you could trump all of that freak with a flavor of your own! Are you up for a challenge?

Call Priestess Wren (SexySongBird) with your carnal confessions!

Ciao, freaks!

Lesbian Strapon Fantasies

Once upon a time, the male sex drive was important. It was crucial in, quite literally the survival of the species … You needed to be horny all the time because, without your sperm donation, we’d not have survived past the first dinosaur dinner. And I understand that … Hell, I’m even willing to go so far as to thank you for your service to all mankind. Without you, I’d not be here, now would I? However, I’d like to point out that those days are LONG gone … and your sex drive isn’t so important anymore.

Who Cums First?
These days, with the advent of modern medicine and the leaps and bounds we are making as a society … well, let’s just say we’ve evolved beyond the need for a male sex drive and have arrived quite nicely in a place where (as most of my male slaves will appreciate) MY sex drive is far superior to yours and my pleasure takes precedence over everything. This means I can indulge whenever and with whomever I’d desire and you’re just happy to go along for the trip.

Most of you would also admit … whether it be Masturbation Instruction or imagining yourself being stroked by a teasing phone sex Goddess … you are pretty much insatiable. Left to your own decisions, you’d probably cum until you went blind! Thankfully, that’s all become moot since I’m the one in charge now.

Quality over Quantity
Now that we’ve established the order of things, let’s talk about HOW we get to my pleasure. It’s not about how often we have sex … After all, your sex drive is a moot afterthought these days … it’s more about engaging in sexual activities that maximize my pleasure. Strap on play is one of those things that falls in this category. They are:

Always available
Bigger than you
More desirable than you
Empowering (for me, anyway)

Most of you will ask, “I don’t understand, Mistress. How is using a silicone phallus empowering?”

Strapons provide for a physical representation of the essential power exchange relationship. Some of the best orgasms of my life came at the end of particularly intense strapon sessions with my slave boys, without any stimulation to my genitals at all …

Why?
Because I love fucking you in the arse. Using a strapon with my slave boys is … something different than the love and attention paid to my wife when we are intimate.

I don’t find it hot in the sexual sense, per say. After all, anyone can push in and out while grunting and sweating (I’m looking at you cuckolds in the group). Turning you into my little bitch is definitely amusing, and the squealing always makes me grin. It’s more about the imbalance of power … knowing that you are submitting to something that you’d NEVER have done before, and probably wouldn’t do without being prompted.

I know you boys like strap on phone sex no matter who’s giving it, but try it with a lesbian Femdom. You’ll find that we have a special touch when it comes to phallic-shaped sex toys.

I expect my phone to be ringing soon, so don’t keep me waiting.