One Million Moms Outraged By the New, Sexually Charged Muppets

Artwork by NACHO DIAZ @ NaolitoArt.com

You might remember One Million Moms from their tirades against basically anything gay or fun on television (like a lesbian yogurt ad, for example. No, seriously). Well, they’re back again to shake their fists furiously at the TV over the latest controversy—a new Muppets show that is apparently much too racy for impressionable youngsters. That’s right, One Million Moms is starting a campaign against the no longer “family-friendly” show, stating: “One ad read, ‘Finally, a network TV show with full frontal nudity.’ Technically, the advertisement is correct – seeing how Kermit doesn’t wear pants.”

Not only are they outraged over a pantless frog, but also Miss Piggy’s openly “pro-choice feminist” interview on MSNBC. “The puppet characters loved by kids in the 1970s and 1980s and beyond are now weighing in on abortion and promiscuity,” One Million Moms says. While these people are clearly crazy, there have actually been other, sane people who have also commented on all the sexy antics of the new show, which focuses quite a bit on romantic relationships. In a recently released video, Kermit gets come-fuck-me eyes from a lusty Muppet (not Miss Piggy; scandalous!), Miss Piggy, aka The Makeout Queen, cheats on Kermit, and Fozzie Bear’s special lady friend’s parents scold her for “being intimate” with wildlife.

Here’s more about the new, sexy Muppets!

NYC Bodypainting Day Celebrates Nudity and Body Art

bodypaintdayNew York City—a place that represents freedom, diversity, and artistic expression. So what better place for a diverse group of people to strip naked in the middle of the city to have their bodies painted? NYC Bodypainting Day celebrates bodies of all shapes and sizes—and, of course, stripping down to your birthday suit in the name of art (check out images below).

The event is free, open to the public, and anyone can volunteer to have their body used as a human canvas. And it celebrates people of all races and colors, literally painting them in every color imaginable. It also promotes body acceptance, since the people participating will actually walk butt-ass naked in a parade down New York City, showing everyone what beauty looks like in all its forms.

Feel like celebrating the beauty of the body? We love all shapes and sizes here!

Find out more about NYC Bodypainting Day here.

College Banner Shows Where to Drop Off “Baby Girl” For a “Good Time”

A fraternity at Old Dominion University in Norfolk, Virginia wanted to greet the incoming freshman class in classic Animal House fashion with some banners. They were displayed at an off-campus home and read “Freshman Daughter Drop Off,” with an arrow pointing at the front door, “Go Ahead And Drop Off Mom Too…” and “Rowdy And Fun, Hope Your Baby Girl Is Ready For A Good Time…”. The banners have since been taken down, but these types of rowdy, sex-crazed messages are certainly nothing new.

fratdropoff

At Ohio State, a banner read: “We’ll take what we can get @59 Clit #Welcum2Cougartown” (“59 Clit” being a play on the name of the street.) Come on, fellas. You can be more ambitious than that! Take a cue from the Virginia dudes—moms and daughters! Seriously though, what sexy lady isn’t going to see that banner, strip all her clothes off, and run into the house ready for action (and we don’t mean beer pong) with a bunch of horny college guys?! Stay classy, frat dudes.

Want to have some rowdy good times with us? You won’t need to take what you can get here!

The New Surgical Procedure That Restores Sensation to the Cock

Image Source: .flickr.com/photos/jaunedeau/What was once thought of as impossible is now possible thanks to the miracle of modern medicine. For men who have lost feeling in their cocks because of spinal injuries—called spina bifida—a new procedure can actually treat the problem. It’s called the TOMAX procedure, and it works by rerouting a nerve that sends sensory information from the groin to the brain.

After the surgery, the men first feel touch on their cocks as occurring in their balls or inner thighs because that’s the place the nerve originally collects the signals. But after a year, they begin to actually feel those amazing, familiar feelings in their cocks again! At first the sensation is tickly, but then it becomes unmistakably erotic due to a shift inside the brain. Now, when their cocks are stroked or touched, their brains reinterpret the sensation in several different areas that signal pleasure. A miracle indeed!

Want to have an amazing sensory experience yourself? We can guarantee you unmistakably erotic feelings!

Here’s more about the procedure that restores sensation to the cock!

The Donald’s Porn Parody

48008133.cachedFinally, the porn parody you never knew you wanted is here with none other than recent GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump. The Donald is following in the footsteps of Sarah Palin and Hilary Clinton as the most recent WoodRocket.com XXX political parody. Lee Roy Myers, the brainchild behind such porn parodies as Bob’s Boners, Game of Bones, and Spongebob Squarenuts said that his decision to make a Trump porno was a no-brainer.

“…we’ve really felt like there was a need to spoof him. Because of what WoodRocket does, spoofing him with penetration seems like the right way to go,” Myer said in an interview with the Daily Beast. Donald Tramp stars porn actor Dick Chibbles, who sports a ridiculous toupee and orange spray tan while yelling un-politically correct, bombastic absurdities. So, naturally you’re wondering what the sex is like. Myers said, “We wanted the sex to be a parody of how Trump would have sex. It’s definitely one of the weirdest things we’ve shot, and we’ve shot a Pokemon porn parody.” Dick Chibbles admitted that besides trying to stay in character without cracking up, keeping that monstrosity of a wig on while getting hot and heavy was definitely no task for “losers!”

Feel like mixing some business with pleasure yourself? We love getting wild with “winners” here!

If, for some strange reason, you want to check out more about Donald Tramp, you can do so here.

The Sex Toy For Your Apple Watch

s4zit0fxdi7wp0exkgx4Sex toy manufacturer Lovense decided to create something even more exciting for the new Apple watch—a high-tech sex toy that can be connected to it. It’s called Blush, and already it has raised $10,000 on Indiegogo. The sex toy can be connected to your Apple watch and your partner‘s Apple watch for some seriously entertaining good times.

Blush can be controlled from up to 30 feet away through your smart phone or Apple watch, which makes it stand out from other sex toy apps. It’s also great for long-distance sex: if both phones are connected to the Internet, the vibrator can be any distance from your partner’s phone. You or your partner can also control the types of sensations you get (pulse, wave, etc.), and it can even be synced up to music or ambient noise to create whatever types of vibrations you’re hankering for. Blush will sell for around $90 in stores, but you can get it for $39 on Indiegogo. And just like Apple, this sex toy is promising to take Bluetooth technology for sex toys to the next level.

Feel like having some innovative and entertaining experiences yourself? We can make you blush right here!

Check out more about the sex toy for your Apple watch here.

Introducing the New and Improved Modern Diaphragm

Source: https://www.caya.eu/
Source: https://www.caya.eu/

The Caya is the new, modern diaphragm that’s reinvigorating an old form of contraception for women. Its look—lilac, with a sleek design like most high-end sex toys—is part of the appeal for younger women looking for a good birth control option. Gone are the days when a diaphragm looked like something your grandmother would use in the 1940s with its putty color and bulky shape. In fact, since IUD’s and the pill became popular, the diaphragm has widely gone out of style since most think of it as something passé and old-fashioned. That’s why Caya was designed: to provide a birth control option that women might actually want to use.

“A 2012 study from the Guttmacher Institute found that 24 percent of women in the developing world who wanted an option for birth control weren’t using any form, because nothing met their needs,” explains The Atlantic. Since most birth control methods are hormonal, many women have opted not to rely on the most readily available kinds, like the pill and the ring. Enter: Caya. It was designed to break the stigma that diaphragms are only something for grandmas. The makers say, “….the old ones look a bit like shriveled pantyhose. They’re fleshy looking and saggy, while the Caya, in its plasticky purpleness, looks like a Barbie accessory.” Caya is smaller, squishier, made of easy to fold silicone, and easy to grip bubbles for seamless removal. And most importantly, Caya is reintroducing a younger generation to a tried-and-try method of birth control.

Want to celebrate the joys of safe sex with us? Three cheers for new, sexy options!

Check out more about Caya here.

FDA Approves Drug to Help Sexual Desire in Women

femaleviagraAfter being rejected twice by the FDA, the third time’s a charm for flibanserin, the new drug that helps women with low sexual desire. While flibanserin may sound like the female Viagra, it’s actually very different. Viagra treats the physiological problem in men of not being able to respond to the desire they feel; this drug aims to treat the problem of not feeling desire in general, which is mental not physical. For this reason, the drug has been controversial, and many people wonder if it can even be effective.

Basically, for the 8-9% of women who have low sexual desire (meaning there’s nothing physically wrong; they just have no motivation for sex), the drug is said to rewire the “desire circuits” in their brains to help them eventually feel more motivation to have sex. Women with this problem have a hard time turning off the critical or judgmental part of their brains when it comes to sex, so this drug hopes to increase the brain’s reward circuits to make sex more exciting and less cerebral. But so far the results of the drug have been mild for the small amount of women it might actually work for (only those with low serotonin levels), and there are side effects that many might consider a deal-breaker. In the meantime, this new drug aimed at helping women’s sexual desire is definitely a historical landmark.

In the mood to turn on your “desire circuits”? We love exciting sexual experiences here!

Read more about the new drug to help sexual desire in women here: https://throb.gizmodo.com/heres-how-that-new-sex-pill-for-women-actually-works-1714264650/1725059776

The Alien-Themed Brothel

You may have heard of Dennis Hof, the famous entrepreneur and owner of several legal brothels in Las Vegas. Well, now Hof is adding a completely different element to his newest sex-establishment: aliens. If you’re dying to try a kinky, extraterrestrial themed sexual experience, look no further than Hof’s “Alien Cathouse.” Here you can finally live out that Princess Leia sex fantasy you’ve always dreamed of (decked out in her chained-and-bound slave costume, of course), or even fuck one of those sexy blue creatures from Avatar.

aliencathouse

All the rooms have different themes, such as “Atlantis,” “Alien Abduction,” and, of course, there’s a “probing room” for all the dangerous, kinky, BDSM stuff. But the kicker: Hof bought the land close in proximity to the sci-fi wet-dreamland spot, Area 51, which is known as the mother of all UFO conspiracy sites. Hof is calling his spot Area 69, and luring all his nerdy, horny patrons to come experience the joys of extraterrestrial fucking.

Feel like having a weird and wild experience yourself? We can make you a believer right here!

Cracked has more about Alien Cathouse here.

Introducing Teledildonics: Computer-Enhanced Dildos

Image provided by www.comingle.io
Image provided by www.comingle.io

Andrew Quitmeyer is putting his PhD in digital media from Georgia Tech to good use—he’s designing the next big thing in dildos: teledildonics. Teledildonics is the latest in sex toys that use computers to open up a whole new world of possibilities. His newest invention, “the Mod,” is an “open source” sex toy that can be synced to any smartphone apps, remote controls, and even your own heart rate!

“You can program it to be anything,” Quitmeyer said of the Mod’s exciting operating system called the Dilduino. The Mod is currently being crowd funded on Indiegogo, and has raised $60,000 from eager would-be customers. The products have gotten a lot of attention for their bizarre, innovative, and some-what intimidating designs, but they also represent what many are calling the new wave in sex toys. The Mod is shaped like a big, smooth finger, is made from silicone, and comes complete with three vibrating motors and a completely rechargeable USB-battery. “Sex tech needs to be opened up,” Quitmeyer said. “People’s sexuality is super specific and weird. I don’t want people to have general sex. I want them to have the weird, specific, crazy, kinky dragon sex of their dreams.”

Feel like having the weird, kinky sex of your dreams? We are all about exciting new ways of getting off here!

Get the specs on Mod and teledildonics here: https://www.vice.com/read/a-patent-troll-is-trying-to-stop-dildo-innovations-803?utm_source=vicefbus