NiteFlirt, Author at Phone Sex: News, Insights, & Secrets NiteFlirt.com

Coffin Company Promotes Its Product with Topless Calendar

A Polish casket company has a somewhat unconventional approach to selling its product—instead of tasteful images of coffins, it features sexy topless women promising your loved one a very good time in the afterlife! The company’s business plan: to feature top-of-the-line caskets with top-of-the-line tits and ass. While it’s controversial to sex up death, this company is pure class when it comes to its caskets with scantily clad ladies draped over them.

This year’s theme is retro, so the sexy girls wrapped in furs and lace can really help the recently deceased go out in style. “We enjoy showing our beautiful coffins, and what better way than including beautiful girls?” company owner Zbigniew Lindner said in a statement. The naked calendar also suggests that your dearly departed will get a whole lot more than just a beautiful casket to rest in peace in! Poland’s Catholic church is justifiably outraged, saying that “human death should not be mixed with sex,” but we wonder whether your frisky Uncle Bob wouldn’t want these ladies to get him even more “stiff” than he already is!

Want to get frisky yourself? We can promise you a very good time right here on Earth!

Check out more about a Polish casket company’s topless calendar.

Men Confess How They Really Feel About Their Dicks

Dicks are great, but let’s be real: the way men feel about theirs varies as much as the dicks themselves. Some men want a bigger dick, some (young) men wish they could have more control over their boners, and yes, some men even wish theirs was smaller. Whatever you’re packing down there, these confessions from real men will prove that dicks are so much more than just a body part.

“The reason I’m still a virgin is because I’m scared my penis is too small.”
This makes us so sad. What this poor virgin should know is that his fear is totally in his head—cause whatever he’s got in his pants is probably just fine!
“Yep. My penis is small. Your point being?”
That’s more like it! Penis size—like age—is just a state of mind!
“Having a big penis really isn’t that good. Wearing jeans hurts like hell to wear!”
Ouch! Bigger isn’t always better!
“Because I’m insecure I tell girls I have a really small dick so when we have sex they see my average dick and tell me it’s big. Pretty childish but it helps.”
You know what’s a huge turn on before you have sex?: feeling comfortable in your own skin.
“People keep asking what’s up this morning…my penis. My penis is up.”
Morning wood is nature’s alarm clock! Better get to work (and we don’t mean your 9 to 5!).
“I’ve shown more people my penis on Whisper than times I’ve left my house this week.”
Hopefully it’s been a slow week….
“My penis is AVERAGE! I thought I was WAY below average…NOPE! I am 5.3 inches. Which so happens to be EXACTLY AVERAGE!
This confession proves that you probably think your dick is smaller than it actually is.
“When I get bored I act like I’m driving a car and my cock is the shifter.”
Talk about pleasure riding!
“Confession: I would suck my own cock if I could.”
Confession: yes, you would, and you’ve probably already tried it…many, many times!

In the mood for a little pleasure ride yourself? When it comes to your shifter, we love all shapes and sizes!

Here’s more men confessing how they really feel about their dicks.

What Grindr Profiles Actually Mean

Buzzfeed’s latest video explores the wonderful and sometimes baffling world of Grindr, the gay hook-up app. If you ever drove yourself crazy trying to decode some hot dude’s ambiguous profile, today’s your lucky day. This humorous (and amazingly accurate) video will answer all of your questions (watch video below).

Sorry If I Don’t Respond
Translation: “Unless you’re really sexy, honey, then by all means, hello hello.
NPNC
Translation: “No pics, no chat. I’m only gonna talk to you if you’re hot.”
Looking
Translation: “Horny. That’s it.”
Bored
Translation: “I’m horny, too.”
Headless Torso
Translation: “I’m not even out yet, but this is a way for me to check out guys.”
NSA
Translation: “No strings attached. I enjoy being single.”
Masc for Masc
Translation: “I’m not fem. Seriously, I’m not. What do I have to do to prove to you that I’m not feminine?!”
No Fatties, No Hispanics, No Blacks
Translation: “I think I’m just being up front about what I want, but I’m just being racist and shallow.”
No Drama
Translation: “No fems, it might rub off on me. I’m being subtly misogynist.”

Are you “looking” for some “NSA” fun? Bring your headless torso our way, honey!

Check out Buzzfeed’s video here.

The History Behind Cosmo’s Infamous Donut Blowjob

Cosmopolitan is famous for its weird, creative, and totally unrealistic sex tips. The magazine has prompted its readers to incorporate such items as a string of pearls, an electric toothbrush, a scrunchie, refrigerated marbles, tomato sauce, and a mango slice into their bedrooms. But their outrageous cover that featured a glazed donut to be used during a blowjob literally took the cake. In tip No. 30, an anonymous boyfriend said, “My girlfriend gets a glazed donut and sticks my penis through the hole. She nibbles around it, stopping to suck me every once in a while. The sugar beads from her mouth tingle on my tip.”

The tip has since come to be known as the most infamous Cosmo sex tip ever written, with authors such as Tom Wolfe, Maureen Dowd, and performance artist Anna Pulley all mocking or satirizing the ridiculous line in their work. But even more outrageous than the tip itself was the way the magazine embraced the donut blowjob’s cult status, reprinting the sex tip several times (including in three books) and even adding a new piece about a study suggesting that the smell of donuts “increases penile blood flow” in men. For all of the magazine’s ludicrous sex tips, you have to hand it to Cosmo for whole-heartedly embracing a spirit of endless sexual experimentation—naysayers and prudes be damned!

In the mood for a little dessert? We are always up for something sweet—and sinful!

Check out the history of Cosmo’s donut blowjob.

Study Finds Most Straight Women are Turned on By Naked Men and Women

A new study is further evidence that sexual identifications like straight, gay, and bi are complex and muddy terms. The study found that most straight women are aroused by images of both naked men and women. “Eighty-two percent of the female participants—and 74 percent of the women who identify as straight—exhibited arousal to both sexes,” Slate reported. So is this proof that women cannot be straight?

Well, not exactly. In scientific terms, an attraction to both genders does technically mean that you’d be considered bi-sexual. But this definition only takes into account one’s sexual identification, not one’s romantic identification. In other words, bi-sexual people are not only attracted to both sexes, but they’d want to date both sexes. While straight women might become aroused by seeing naked images of both sexes (which is largely a physiological response because of the way women’s brains are wired), they don’t necessarily want to act on their feelings of sexual desire. Mainly, this study shows how slippery and confusing sexual orientation can be—and how sexually versatile women are!

Feel like having an arousing experience yourself? Whatever turns you on works for us; we are definitely sexually versatile here!

Check out more about the study that found straight women are aroused by naked men and women here.

50 Cent Says Bullet Lodged in Tongue is Great for Oral Sex

50 Cent is a celebrated rapper, survivor of growing up in the ghetto, and, apparently, great at giving head! Most people know the story of 50 Cent getting shot nine times at close-range, but what they may not know is that one of those bullets is still lodged in his tongue. And, even stranger, that it is great for oral sex!

The rapper appeared on the Graham Norton Show recently and told the audience and the other guests on stage about the bullet in his tongue—and how “it’s great for oral sex.” He also quipped that it’s made him “a better man now.” One feisty English actress wanted to check out his special enhancement for herself, so 50 pulled the woman close and let her feel the bullet in his tongue. 50 Cent, you naughty, naughty rapper, you!

In the mood for a little sexual enhancement? Come get naughty with us!

Check out more about 50 Cent’s amazing oral-sex-giving bullet-tongue.

Lustiest Painting in History is the Second Most Expensive

Amedeo Modigliani’s famous drug-induced erotic masterpiece “Nu couché” just sold for $170.4 million, making it the second most expensive painting ever sold after Picasso’s “Women of Algiers.” The painting has been called “a hymn to lust,” with a nude, black-eyed seductress lying back on a red bed, offering herself up to the viewer. Painted in 1917-18, the artist was a penniless, drug-addled bohemian, who likely wouldn’t believe the price his high-art erotica fetched nearly a century later.

The artwork proves once again that sex really does sell. It’s even more graphic than Picasso’s “Women of Algiers” with their multiple cubist breasts and asses scattered around the canvas. “Nu couché” is a sensual masterpiece, mixing modernist elements with erotic thrills and seduction. It was painted during WWI, during an absinthe-haze, in which Modigliani takes as his subject his lover in all her seductive majesty—escaping the brutality of the war in her black, lusty eyes.

Looking for some erotic thrills yourself? You don’t need millions of dollars to enjoy NiteFlirt’s hymn to lust!

Here’s more about art history’s lustiest and second most expensive painting.

Ronda Rousey’s (Bad) Sex Advice

Ronda Rousey is considered one of the world’s best fighters, so you’d think that she’d know a thing or two about winning…in the bedroom! Maxim recently sat down with the UFC champion to talk sex and dating, and she had some great advice for men. In response to a question about what a guy should always do in bed, Rousey recommends he “take his time.” While this is excellent advice, the rest of what she said wasn’t exactly (sexual) gold.

“In general, a girl takes a minute. He needs to get her ready. You should never need lube in your life. If you need lube, than [sic] you’re being lazy… and you’re not taking your time,” she said. Although it’s good to know that Rousey’s pussy is always naturally wet and ready for action, this is not true of many women, no matter how good the foreplay is. This is especially bad advice if you want to have some anal play, as not all orifices are adequately slippery enough without lube. As a sex educator put it, her advice is basically like “telling massage therapists that using massage oil is being lazy.” To put it simply: don’t K.O. lube, Rousey; lube is always a winner.

Feel like working up a sweat? Come take your time with us!

Here’s more of Ronda Rousey’s sex advice.

Magical Liquid Strips Away Clothes in Sexy New Video

There’s a new video by Tim Fitzgerald making the rounds on the internet that shows sexy peoples’ clothes being stripped off with a magical liquid. And it’s really cool! A splash of the crazy liquid makes clothes immediately disappear wherever it lands, like invisible paint that vaporizes whatever it touches. And not only is it really, really cool, it’s also super hot! (watch the video below).

In one part of the video, you see a sexy woman’s ass magically revealed through her tight mini-skirt as soon as the liquid is thrown at her booty. Then, a guy spits the liquid all over a woman’s crotch, and her bare pussy is suddenly revealed. And it doesn’t stop there: the liquid is splashed over dudes too, revealing sudden cocks of all shapes and sizes. When a woman drips the stuff over her shirt, her nipples suddenly appear. So, what’s the crazy liquid? A neat camera trick using paint! They film once with green paint splashing on the people and another time with everyone naked, then layer the footage on top of each other, making it appear as though the splashing liquid were vaporizing clothes into mid-air!

In the mood to have your mind blown? We can make your clothes suddenly disappear right here!

Check out the video.

Paint Stripper from Tim Fitzgerald on Vimeo.

Couples Who Share Chores Have Better and More Frequent Sex

Tired housewives all over the world are rejoicing over a new study from University of Alberta which found that heterosexual couples who share chores have better and more frequent sex. The study’s findings showed that when a man fairly pitched in around the house, the couple had sex more often, and that each person reported more sexual satisfaction. The head researcher of the study is a couple’s therapist who set out to debunk a 2012 study that claimed that when men contributed equally to chores traditionally considered “women’s work” (the dishes, cooking, etc.), the couple had less sex. But that seemed counter-intuitive based on his experiences with the couples he worked with as a therapist.

After analyzing data from a five-year study of 1,338 German couples, he found that his instinct had been correct. The data showed that not only did helping out with chores not hurt a couple’s sex life, it actually enhanced it. Although seeing a man roll up his sleeves and get his hands dirty is pretty sexy, that isn’t why sharing chores helps a guy’s chance of getting good lovin’ more often. “Knowing that a partner is pulling his weight prevents anger and bitterness, creating more fertile ground in which a (satisfying) sexual encounter may occur,” the researcher explained. So basically, if men want to get that sweet dessert after dinner, they better do those dishes first!

Want to have a sexually satisfying experience yourself? Don’t worry, we won’t make you break out the swiffer for that!

Check out more about the chores/sex study here.