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The Most Wholesome Channel On Pornhub Is Blowing Up

A very unlikely channel on Pornhub has been surging in popularity lately: a fully clothed man doing sweet and wholesome things. Along with searched for terms like Stormy Daniels, Fortnite, and Bowsette, it seems thousands of fans are flocking to Creamer’s Channel, aka, a comedian’s SFW channel on Pornhub. It’s racked up more than 1 million views with videos like “I Tuck You In After You Have Cum,” in which he tucks sheets around the camera and offers a kiss goodnight.

Other hits include “I Deliver You a Pizza And Don’t Put My Weiner In It,” “I Offer You Water (In Case You Are Parched Post-Orgasm),” and “POV Forehead Kiss Compilation.” Several videos have over 100,000 views. Facebook and Twitter users are especially fond of the softcore channel—in response to the video “I do the dishes without being asked,” someone tweeted “TAKE MY BODY OH MY GOD,” while someone else replied “that’s porn for parents.”

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Check out more about a comedian’s SFW channel on Pornhub: https://www.dailydot.com/unclick/ryan-creamer-pornhub/

Sex Is Ruining One Of The Most Popular Nude Beaches In The World

Frisky tourists hooking up on Ibiza’s most famous nudist beach is causing massive damage to the island’s protected sand dunes. Environmentalists say sex on the beach is to blame for the erosion of the famous, but delicate, dunes which are part of Ses Salines Natural Park. Geologists and biologists explain that the excessive sexual activity is causing damage which can’t be undone and has turned the zone into an “outdoor riding arena.”

Sexual activity is “degrading” the landscape and a unique geological system. This is because frequent sex is uprooting fragile plants on the sand which are vital for the environment. Websites promote Es Cavallet as “an ideal place to walk naked and look for a lover” among the sand dunes. “If you feel like it, you can walk through the dunes in search of ‘adventures’”.

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Check out more about how sex is ruining a famous nude beach: https://nypost.com/2019/01/30/sex-is-ruining-one-of-the-most-popular-nude-beaches-in-the-world/

‘Sexy Images’ Of Women Make Men Crave Red Meat, Study Says

A new study proves an old stereotype about what (straight) guys want: sex and red meat. Researchers behind “Is Meat Sexy?” claim that sexy images of women leave men hankering for a big slab of juicy meat. The study tracked more than 1,600 men and women in the US, UK and Australia to explore advertising’s impact on red meat consumption and how that relates to sex.

When experiencing “sexual motivation,” the men tended to act out in ways that “increase their desirability” as a sex partner, which includes using meat as a signaling status. As NY Post says, “few things say ‘I’m a powerful, hot-blooded man’ like a thick, juicy porterhouse steak.” This explains fast-food chains’ use of oversexed ads—like when Kim Kardashian was featured in a Carl’s Jr. ad, or when Kraft billed their frozen dinners as “Food You Want To Fork.”

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Check out more about a study linking sex and red meat: https://nypost.com/2019/02/06/sexy-images-of-women-make-men-crave-red-meat-study/

Tumblr Users Are Tagging Porn With The ‘Citrus Scale’

There was a saying back in the early aughts: when life gives you lemons, it’s actually giving you porn. The ‘citrus scale’ was created in the 2000s, using code words like ‘lemon’ and ‘grapefruit’ for explicit online content. Well, now Tumblr users are bringing it back to hide X-rated content on the site.

What started as a nostalgic, NSFW joke now has an actual purpose since Tumblr’s porn ban. It’s an efficient way to share NSFW content without getting flagged. ‘Lemon’ means explicit content, ‘grapefruit’ is a tag for kinky content, and ‘orange’ is the word for ‘weird fet shit.’ Delicious!

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Check out more about Tumblr users tagging porn with the “citrus scale”: https://www.dailydot.com/parsec/tumblr-porn-lemon-citrus-scale/

A Suburban House With A Sex Dungeon Has Gone Viral

A Philadelphia real estate listing called “50 Shades of Maple Glen” has gone viral. The house boasts a lovely brick colonial with five bedrooms, an updated kitchen, and a “private adult sexual oasis” in the basement! It’s been viewed more than 500,000 times on Redfin since it went live less than 24 hours ago.

The house was staged with full BDSM gear and a sex swing in the basement’s sex dungeon. In photos on Zillow and Redfin, there are whips and chains hanging from rafters, a bed with a cage for the headboard, sex toys, and various sex pillows strewn around the room. Who doesn’t want a basement with ample space for bondage equipment and sex parties?!

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Check out more about a suburban house with a sex dungeon going viral: https://slate.com/human-interest/2019/02/philadelphia-sex-house-interview-with-realtor-melissa-leonard.html

National Enquirer Tried To Extort Jeff Bezos Over Dick Pics

A shocking headline that read “Bezos Reveals Pecker” was splashed across newsstands recently—but not for the reasons you think. Jeff Bezos has published a letter sent to him by a National Enquirer editor, David Pecker, threatening to publish his dick pics. The editor also claimed to have nude photos of the woman Bezos had an affair with, specifically her “nether regions.”

But Bezos wasn’t having it—he posted the letter, explaining “if in my position I can’t stand up to this kind of extortion, how many people can?” Some of the racy photos include Bezos’ mistress simulating oral sex on a cigar, a naked bathroom selfie, Bezos’ dick and his mistresses’ pussy. Bezos said that while he doesn’t want the world seeing his dick, this issue of tabloids trying to extort him is too huge to ignore.

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Check out more about the National Enquirer trying to extort Jeff Bezos over nude sexts: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6680669/National-Enquirer-threatened-publish-explicit-nude-photos-Jeff-Bezos-mistress.html

There’s A New ‘Tiny Penis’ Emoji

People have long-ago figured out how to turn seemingly innocuous emojis into raunchy symbols. First there was the eggplant emoji, and now there’s the ‘pinching hand’ emoji. “Finally, an emoji to explain how small my ex used to be down there,” tweeted @fifthdumbledore after the new images were released.

The hand gesture suggesting someone has a ‘tiny penis’ is among 230 new emojis released for 2019. The Unicode Consortium, the organization behind the new emojis, says the new pic is supposed to be a ‘pinching hand’ gesture, meaning a ‘small amount’ — but Twitter users aren’t buying it. “FINALLY a small dick emoji,” tweeted Twitter user @KathBarbadoro. For something so tiny, this new emoji seems like the next big thing!

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Check out more about the new ‘tiny penis’ emoji: https://nypost.com/2019/02/06/people-are-surprisingly-satisfied-with-the-new-tiny-penis-emoji/

Pornhub Says Patriots Fans Watched Less Porn Than Rams Fans During Super Bowl

Some people weren’t as enthusiastic about watching the Super Bowl as they were about watching Pornhub. In particular, New Englanders were notably more hyped about the big game than horny Californians, according to Pornhub’s annual Super Bowl analytics. Massachusetts and New Hampshire had the largest drops in traffic during the Super Bowl, down by 42 percent, while California only saw a 19 percent drop in Pornhub traffic during the same time period.

In general, traffic didn’t fall as much during this Super Bowl as in past years, proving that people across the U.S. may have been less invested in the Super Bowl and more interested in getting off. Still, people were at least in the game day spirit: Pornhub’s popular searches for Sunday included “Super Bowl/Superbowl” and “Patriots.” Searches for “touchdown” surged 3115 percent, and searches for “football cheerleader” and “cheerleader orgy” were up 972 percent and 644 percent, respectively.

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Check out more about Pornhub’s analytics during the Super Bowl: https://mashable.com/article/super-bowl-pornhub-data-patriots-rams/#lsw1aUfG2Zq6

Meghan Markle Wrote Uplifting Messages For Sex Workers On Bananas

Image Credit: Mashable/TOBY MELVILLE – WPA POOL/GETTY IMAGES

Meghan Markle is putting the X in Duchess of Sussex. She recently visited an organization that helps sex workers and left the women a touching note of support. On dozens of bananas, she wrote an uplifting, handwritten message.

The Duchess wrote notes like “You are loved,” “You are strong,” “You are special,” and “You are brave” for the sex workers. The CEO of the organization said, “The women we support are often hidden from society and this visit shines a light on the enormous challenges they face and the incredible strength they have.” She added, “She had clearly listened and heard what we are all about — that we don’t judge, we simply offer the service and unconditional love. She totally got it.”

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Check out more about Meghan Markle writing uplifting messages for sex workers: https://mashable.com/article/meghan-markle-duchess-of-sussex-one25-organization-banana-notes/#Dq4omFeEm8qR

You Can Now Buy An Aquaman Dildo

You can now enjoy Aquaman in a much more intimate way. Sex toy company Geeky Sex Toys have just released AquaMoan, a silicone dildo which features a scaly texture and curves reminiscent of the Justice League hero. This is the company that previously made toys inspired by franchises like the Avengers, Star Wars, and Guardians of the Galaxy.

Geeky Sex Toys’ philosophy is to make toys that are entertaining and visually pleasing, not just … pleasing in other ways. The $61 sex toy is a limited release of 500. For more underwater adventures, there’s also a Shape of Water inspired Fish-man dildo that was released earlier this year by XenoCatArtifacts’s Etsy store. We have a feeling these aquatic sex toys will be perfect for the shower!

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Check out more about a new Aquaman dildo: https://mashable.com/article/aquaman-dildo-sex-toy/#_vuZbdOJMPq9